Tuesday, July 21, 2015
That's My 2 Cents: Two Times Colonel Sanders Appeared in Video Games
Considering that Pepsi and Coca-Cola made completely necessary video games that weren't at all a waste of human potential, gaming visionaries decided that the next big face of gaming was a goatee-clad curmudgeon from somewhere in Kentucky. After all, nothing says good marketing like an old man in a white suit!
Trio the Punch (1990)
an episode of the G-Files as well as having the greatest box art ever. Those two guys..... Just look at them go.......(?)
The whole game is a parody experience which, considering the fact that it's from Japan, shouldn't be all that surprising. What IS surprising, though, is the colorful and bizarre cast of characters and enemies.
Are spike-clad turtles and walking shiitakes a little too boring? How about a sheep made of cotton candy shooting out miniature sheep heads or giant cyan feet jumping all over the place like professional league hopscotch? Lastly, of course, there's Colonel Sanders, doing what he does best; bouncing all over the place like a pogo stick on ecstasy.
Lastly, some lovably flawed Engrish pops up, declaring "WIN WIN" because winning once is for chumps.
Beause I'm too lazy to figure out a good way to segue to the next part, here's a link to Michelangelo's "Dying Slave" truly finding himself.
Phantasy Star Portable 2: Infinity
Also, product placement!
Basically, you go through a magical KFC rainbow portal and find a KFC shop. No big deal, just an intergalactic wormhole that leads to a fast food restaurant. There, you can buy such weapons as "Mustard Gun" and "Chicken Weave", which sounds less like a weapon and more like some hairstyle from the '80s.
Oh yeah, and there's also Colonel Sanders. He's okay I guess. He doesn't really do much.